Updating Every Weekday Unless Something Horrible Happens to Me

Everyone's got it rough.

That last line is actually a reference to Rambo II. Everyone in California says that they miss the winter. No one here does. Even when it's April. Because it's still winter here in April. You see how that works? And even if some New Yorkers would eventually come to miss winter, some of us here are BORN WITH TANS. We're physically not built to handle this life-threatening weather you all say we'll magically pine for. True story: Simon's brother moved to Florida, hating the cold of the North. He later moved to North Carolina for a job. But he eventually moved back to Florida because North Carolina still had seasons that weren't summer.

Toasted Pixel Presents: KNIFE -A Love Story-

"Knife! You came back! I missed you knife!" This is a screenshot from the French thriller, High Tension, which will open in America on June 3rd. Apparently, the French are just as nutty about their publicity stills are we Americans are. As it is, the screenshots they release paint a lovely romance between a woman and her cutting tools. "Nothing will come between us again, diesel circular saw cutter. Nothing." The actual plot of the movie is that this woman and her friend get terrorized by a maniac with a knife. That's right, she's not actually the psycho in this movie. Apparently. But I guess the real killer wasn't chic enough for those posh French photographers to bother with.