Notice it says "Win, Lose, or Die."
I guess you'd better lose if you don't win if you know what's good for you.
The movie Stay Alive,
about video games that kill people, is here. In that spirit, we give you
Ghost Game, which was supposed to have the same premise but
actually doesn't have a game as far as we can tell.
The movie opens 30 years ago,
with a small group of canoeing ravers.
To signify the period and to emulate the look of 30 years ago,
the movie goes black and white (green and white, eh), since color film wasn't invented by the mid '70s.
The frame also shakes, a lot, to a seizure degree in fact, and uses fake screen grain
to signify old celluloid, since TV wasn't invented by the '70s either.
We then cut to modern times (huh?), where a group of teens go on vacation. They drive to a cabin resort, and
then the guys and girls have a canoe race to an island. When the guys start catching up to the women, the
girls use a sure-fire way to win any race:
Click here to see plausibility. (mpg size: 1.64MB)
Men are idiots. Ghost Game.
We go to breasts.
When they get to the island, they realize there's nothing to do in their cabin, so they decide to
look for a board game. That's when they find this box in a closet.
And they decide, who knows why, that it's a board game, and they decide to play it.
Oh boy! Rust box!
Then they open the box and decide these are the instructions on how to play the game.
They don't stop believing this during the film. Shrug.
The film starts moving back and forth between the two plots, and we discover that the
three green-and-white women are witches. Two of them have arranged for the Greek Goddess Athena to
wait behind the door of a cabin in the woods, ready to pounce on the third woman and kill her.
We never find out why, though.
In any case, when this is revealed, that's when the witches start wrestling each other on the ground.
Then, in these black and white ancient times amidst the Greek Goddess Athena, a guy in a hoodie shows up
and starts participating in the fighting with the witches:
Click here to see, uh, well I don't know. (mpg size: 2.03MB)
Incidentally, we never find out who this guy is or why he's participating in ancient witchcraft and
Mediterranean dieties. But he does have an urband branded sweatshirt, which I guess is cool.
Well, back to the present. People in the group start dying mysteriously, it seems because of this game.
The survivors decide to play
the game more to, well, I haven't figured that part out yet. Anyway, the game seems to get them on a
scavenger hunt for animals and things around the island, which is apparently easier to do without midriffs
on your shirt at night.
Anyway, people keep on dying, and... well let's just show you how one of the group gets killed,
it may help you with the mystery:
Click here to see fashion rage gone waaaaay too far. (mpg size: 3.33MB)
When the survivors see her corpse, they rationally decide that she was killed by magic:
Click here to see college student logic. Stupid, stupid college student logic. (mpg size: 1.18MB)
This series of killings goes on for a while, until only one woman is left. Then the witches from
the past appear to her, to tell her their entire evil plan so she can try to thwart it, although
the plan doesn't make any sense so she can't.
Twenty minutes later, the witches are still explaining their plot, which involves class rings among
other things, if that gives you an indication of how well it goes.
Click here to see how she was all like ew how could she be all like then she said talk to the hand and then-- (mpg size: 1.55MB)
"Bark in bite." She said that.
There are more twists to the movie, but we don't want to ruin the clever ending involving hotel reception desk
employees. We tried to find a buy link for you, but no one is selling it it seems. Oh come on, why not?
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