Did you learn about foreshadowing in school? We love it. Especially if it's done as early as the opening credits.
Foreshadowing is the act of putting dramatic music to medieval-style paintings while names like Meat Loaf appear
in evil vampire font in the foreground.
So yeah, Meat Loaf is indeed in the movie. His role in the film is Meat Loaf. This is how he reacts to
hearing a character say the word "Kagan."
Wow, I was JUST thinking that!
(mpg size: 2.67 MB)
And that concludes Meat Loaf's role in the film.
He appears before and after horse shots.
Horse shots, which seems to be a majority of the film, are Where's Waldo shots of people on horses without any
dialogue or purpose. Come to think of it, I don't know why they're in the film.
There are 40 such shots. Here are a couple:
Don't Worry, You'll Get More Opportunities to Spot The Horse.
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In fact, if you DID miss some of the film's shots, you'll get to see them again. There are 16 cuts to flashbacks
in BloodRayne, although we have to admit nearly all of them are to the same two scenes. They're afraid we
forgot those scenes. Aw.
When we say you'll get to see the film's shots again, we mean it. In fact, here you go, one flashback,
one film:
In Case You Didn't Pay Attention the First Time: The Movie
(wmv size: 4.76 MB)
Notice there are more horse shots following the flashback. If you've got the movie now, let's get into the nitty
gritty. Uwe Boll is a big fan of lovin', and his films have gratuitous sex scenes like nobody's business. This is
especially horrendous if you think about Uwe Boll during the scene, and knowing that he's eyeing the same thing you
are. That and you're staring at household objects while loving takes up one percent of the picture.
Oh awesome. A table.
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At some point, you have to start to wonder if everything that happens in the movie is Uwe Boll's fault.
Soon after, you realize it is, because he had to have auditioned Michelle Rodriguez for the role of someone
with a British accent and said OK to it. Thus, her British accent is still his fault. And there's lots
of fault to notice.
At least, I THINK that's supposed to be an accent.
(wmv size: 2.76 MB)
And then of course, there's the strobe shot in a combat scene. If only Star Wars movies had more of those during
fights.
As seen in your casio camera.
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So yeah, Uwe Boll's fault. It's good to say that.
And finally, enjoy
our comparison
between Uwe Boll and spam emails. Find out who's the better man.
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